You’re Engaged, Now What? A Comprehensive Guide to Your Next Steps

Congratulations! You’re engaged—cue the confetti, happy tears, and endless scrolling through Pinterest for wedding inspiration. This moment is yours to celebrate, but once the initial euphoria subsides, it’s natural to wonder: “What comes next?”

Whether your dream wedding is an intimate elopement or a grand gala, this guide will walk you through the next steps with actionable advice, tips, and inspiration to make your journey to “I do” as stress-free as possible. Let’s break it down!

Step 1: Take Time to Celebrate Your Engagement

The period right after getting engaged is magical. Savor it! Don’t rush into planning mode immediately—this is a once-in-a-lifetime moment to enjoy with your partner.

Ways to celebrate your engagement:

• Intimate Celebration: Host a small dinner with your closest friends and family to share the big news.
• Engagement Party: Throw a casual backyard barbecue or an elegant cocktail soirée. It doesn’t have to be extravagant—it’s about celebrating the commitment you’ve made.
• Capture the Moment: Plan an engagement photoshoot. Choose a location that holds sentimental value, like where you first met, or simply pick a scenic spot for stunning pictures.
• Share Thoughtfully: Announce your engagement in a way that feels personal. Whether it’s a social media post, a video montage, or even handwritten notes to loved ones, make it special.

Pro Tip: This is also a good time to start your wedding journal or create a shared Pinterest board to gather ideas and document this exciting journey.

Step 2: Talk About Your Vision

Wedding planning starts with a big-picture conversation. Sit down with your partner to brainstorm what you want for your big day. You might find your visions align—or that you need to blend different ideas to create a shared dream.

Conversation Starters for Your Vision:

• Guest Count: Do you want an intimate affair with 50 guests or a blowout celebration with 300?
• Style: Think about adjectives that describe your ideal wedding—rustic, romantic, modern, glamorous, whimsical.
• Setting: Are you envisioning a sunlit beach, a cozy barn, or a grand ballroom? Consider cultural or sentimental venues, too.
• Mood: What do you want your wedding to feel like? A chic black-tie evening? A laid-back garden party? A vibrant cultural celebration?
• Must-Haves: List non-negotiables. It could be a specific song, a type of cuisine, or a decor element that holds special meaning.

Pro Tip: Discuss your partner’s expectations for the wedding planning process—who wants to take the lead on what, and what aspects you’ll decide together.

photographed by: @west_is_indigo florals by: @flowersbysunshine

Step 3: Set Your Budget

Money talk can feel daunting, but a clear budget is your North Star for wedding planning. It keeps expectations realistic and helps you prioritize the elements that matter most.

How to Create Your Budget:

• Start Broad: Determine the total amount you’re comfortable spending. Don’t forget to consider contributions from family members or friends who want to pitch in.
• Break It Down: Allocate percentages to major categories. For example:
  1. Venue and Catering: 40%
  2. Photography/Videography: 15%
  3. Décor: 10%
  4. Attire: 10%
  5. Entertainment: 8%
  6. Miscellaneous: 7%
  7. Emergency Fund: 10%
• Research Costs: Use tools like WeddingWire, The Knot, or Zola to get realistic estimates for vendors in your area.

Pro Tip: Keep a spreadsheet or app to track expenses. Unexpected costs will arise, so leave wiggle room in your budget.

Step 4: Choose Your Date and Venue

Your wedding date and venue set the foundation for your entire event. They influence the theme, guest availability, and even your attire.

How to Choose a Wedding Date:

• Consider meaningful dates like anniversaries, birthdays, or holidays.
• Think about weather—fall weddings are cozy, while spring offers blooming florals.
• Factor in guests traveling from afar; avoid busy travel seasons or holidays if possible.
• Give yourself enough planning time. A year to 18 months is ideal for larger weddings.

Picking the Perfect Venue:

• Schedule tours at multiple venues to compare options.
• Check if the venue provides in-house services (like catering or décor) or if you’ll need external vendors.
• Ask about restrictions (noise, guest count, décor rules).
• Picture the venue fully decorated—could it match your theme?

Pro Tip: Always read the fine print on venue contracts. Confirm deposit policies, cancellation clauses, and what’s included in the package.

photographed by: @studiovieren

Step 5: Build Your Vendor Dream Team

The right vendors are key to turning your vision into reality. These professionals bring their expertise to make your day seamless and stunning.

Must-Book Vendors:

• Wedding Planner/Coordinator: Hiring a planner or day-of coordinator is essential. You may think you can handle everything, but on your wedding day, you should focus on enjoying every moment—not coordinating vendors and timelines. A coordinator ensures that all the moving parts work together seamlessly, from vendor arrivals to the final send-off.
• Photographer and Videographer: Research portfolios to find someone whose style resonates with you—documentary, fine art, or traditional.
• Caterer: Schedule tastings early. Guests often remember the food!
• DJ or Band: Book entertainment that reflects your vibe—whether it’s a high-energy DJ or a soulful live band.

Pro Tip: Book high-demand vendors first (venue, planner, photographer). These fill up quickly, especially during peak wedding season.

Step 6: Assemble Your Wedding Party

Your wedding party will support you emotionally and logistically. Choose people who uplift you and make the planning process enjoyable. But here’s the thing: having a wedding party isn’t a must. If you feel that skipping the tradition works better for you—whether it’s to keep things simpler, avoid added costs, or just because it’s not your style—that’s completely okay. Many couples today are opting to go without a wedding party, focusing instead on their connection and shared celebration with all their guests.

Creative Ways to Ask (if you choose to have one):

• Gift personalized items like mugs, jewelry, or mini champagne bottles.
• Write heartfelt notes explaining why they’re special to you.
• Plan a surprise brunch or gathering and “pop the question” to your party.

Pro Tip: Don’t feel pressured to follow traditional gender roles. Mixed-gender bridal parties are increasingly popular! Or, keep things small with just one or two attendants—or none at all. It’s your day, your way.

photographed by: @studiovieren

Step 7: Plan the Details

Once the big pieces are in place, start focusing on the details. These are what make your wedding truly yours.

Key Details to Consider:

• Attire: Start dress/tuxedo shopping at least 9-12 months out. Consider your venue and theme when choosing styles.
• Invitations: Create a cohesive design that matches your theme. Tools like Minted, Basic Invite, or Canva are great options for custom invitations. Canva, in particular, is perfect for couples who want a hands-on approach to design without breaking the budget.
• Decor: Work with vendors to create a cohesive look for your bouquets, centerpieces, arches, and more.
• Ceremony and Reception Timeline: Plan the order of events, from vows to cake cutting.

Pro Tip: Include personal touches like custom vows, signature cocktails, or décor elements that tell your story.

Step 8: Embrace Pre-Wedding Events

Engagement parties, bridal showers, bachelor/bachelorette trips, and rehearsal dinners are part of the fun. These events give you a chance to celebrate with different groups of loved ones.

Tips for Pre-Wedding Events:

• Delegate planning to family or friends who offer to help.
• Stay within your budget—these events don’t need to be elaborate.
• Use these moments to test out themes or vendors (e.g., catering).

Step 9: Prioritize Your Relationship

Amid the excitement of wedding planning, it’s easy to get caught up in the details and forget the most important part of this journey: your love and commitment to each other. Taking intentional time to focus on your relationship not only strengthens your bond but also sets the foundation for a successful marriage.

Ways to Stay Connected:

• Schedule Quality Time: Make room for date nights where wedding talk is off-limits. Whether it’s a cozy night in or an adventurous outing, these moments remind you why you’re saying “I do.”
• Explore Pre-Marital Counseling: Programs or sessions designed for couples can spark meaningful conversations and help you navigate married life with confidence.
• Create Keepsakes Together: Write letters to each other, build a memory box, or plan a time capsule to open on a future anniversary.
• Celebrate the Everyday Moments: Find joy in small, daily rituals—like cooking together, taking a walk, or sharing a morning coffee. These are the moments that strengthen your partnership.

Step 10: Practice Self-Care

Wedding planning is a marathon, not a sprint. Make time for relaxation and reflection.

Self-Care Tips:

• Schedule spa days or yoga classes to decompress.
• Create a stress-free morning routine—start your day with journaling or meditation.
• Lean on your support system. Friends and family are there to help.

Conclusion: Your Wedding, Your Story

Planning your wedding is more than just a checklist; it’s the beginning of your shared story as a married couple. Each decision you make—from the venue to the smallest detail—is a reflection of your unique love story. Along the way, there will be moments of joy, frustration, and excitement—but through it all, remember that the heart of your wedding is the commitment you’re making to one another.

When the big day comes, let go of perfection. Trust your vendors, rely on your coordinator, and focus on what truly matters: celebrating your love with the people who mean the most to you.

You’re not just planning a wedding—you’re crafting a memory that will last a lifetime. So, take a deep breath, soak it all in, and enjoy every step of the journey.

You’ve got this.